Putting the relating back into your relationship

As a first blog on my shiny new site I just really wanted to say hello and mention a few hopes I have for what Lovebirds might bring you. You’ve only got to look through the newspapers to see how we seem endlessly fascinated by relationships – and I think it’s because we tend to find them so hard to get right. Most of the unhappy times in my life have been the result of a relationship going bad (I seemed to have quite a few of those) and I think it led to my fascination with why living with someone you love can be so frustrating, and difficult and challenging. It should be hearts and flowers, surely?

I’ve become convinced that much of the difficulties come from a simple root: we treat other people as if they’re the same as us, and do to them what we’d like done to us. It’s that simple. I wrote Lovebirds to give you the tools to understand the ways we’re not the same as each other, and the knowledge that will mean that you can use the differences between you to bring you closer. So often our differences make us feel bad and unloved. They don’t need to, once you understand how your partner knows they’re loved, and what you can do to trigger that feeling – and they understand the same of you – then creating intimacy becomes a simple matter. You really can put relating to each other at a deep level at the heart of your relationship.

So that’s my hope for you. Please feel free to email me with any questions you have that I can turn into a blog. I’d really like this place to develop into a site that helps my readers.